One of my good friends started an email conversation to determine what would make up the ideal Superhero Cabinet in his administration. The conversation went back and forth over email for a few weeks, then we convened for his birthday, and to decide on the final pics and make our arguments for each position. Hit the jump for the results. 

Secretary of Agriculture: Superman

The general consensus was that while Supes is ridiculously powerful, he was really too much of a knob to be in change of anything having to deal with foreign policy. Plus he’s one of the only superheroes who grew up on a farm

Secretary of Commerce: Iron Man

Iron Man was the choice for Secretary of Commerce because everyone was fairly impressed that Tony Stark could maintain a global financial powerhouse while boozing and saving the world. 

Secretary of Defense: War Machine

War Machine was chosen for Defense Secretary because he has real practical military experience and is kind of like Iron Man without the crippling alcoholism. 

Secretary of Education: Professor Charles Xavier

This one was a no brainer, Professor X is the only superhero with the chops to handle the Secretary of Education post. Of note is that we did not consider Slim Goodbody as a valid candidate. 

Secretary of Energy: Dr. Manhattan

This was a pretty controversial choice since the good doctor doesn’t really care about humanity. The fact that he is made of and can control energy ended up winning out. 

Secretary of Health and Human Services: Dr. Strange

He’s a Doctor, and actually cares about people. Nuff said. 

Secretary of Homeland Security: RoboCop

Beyond the initial, “Holy shit it’s RoboCop,” reaction, once you run down the Prime Directives RoboCop makes even more sense as Homeland Security Chief. Plus he could totally take Michael Chertoff in a fight. 

Secretary of Housing and Urban Development: Jack Hawksmoor

He’s the “King of Cities” and can feel the power and mood of any city he’s in. Plus he converted Tokyo into a giant humanoid and used it to defeat future Kansas City. 

Secretary of the Interior: Swamp Thing

The earliest Eco-hero, this one makes a ton of sense. Not to mention that Swamp Thing is actually made of the interior of the country.

Secretary of Labor: Thor

Bear with me on this one. It seems a bit odd until you realize that he wields the hammer Mojilnir, one-half of the symbol of the Workers Party. 

Secretary of State: Storm

We chose Storm because not only does she have the ability to make weather a part of international negotiations, she also was more or less the Secretary of State for the X-Men. 

Secretary of Transportation: Optimus Prime

Not only is his goal the protection of the human race, it’s also in his best interest that rail, road, and air transport in the U.S. is the best it can be. 

Secretary of the Treasury: Batman

Bruce Wayne is incredibly wealthy and a huge philanthropist, both qualities that we felt were important in steering the direction of the Treasury department in these trying times. 

Secretary of Veteran Affairs: Captain America

He’s a veteran, and has some of the same knob potential as Superman, so it was just as important to us that he would be an excellent candidate as it was that he wouldn’t be able to screw up too much while in this position. 

Attorney General: She Hulk

She beat out Dare Devil, mainly because she’s hot, but also because we didn’t feel that Dare Devil has the right temperament for the job. 

That’s all the posts we filled, and there was a lot of discussion about each post. If you’ve got comments feel free to leave them. Big thanks to John for coming up with this exercise. Up next, the National Cartoon Basketball Association Draft.